Fathers Day is here. If you haven’t bought your hubby his yearly King of the Grill shirt yet, you’d better hop to it!
All kidding aside, Fathers Day is a great opportunity to reflect on your life together as a team, and it’s prime time for you – yes, you – to ask yourself, “How am I holding up my end of the bargain?”
Do you remember when you first got engaged? Or the day you said, “I do?” If you’re anything like me, you’ve probably said something like this a million times since then: “He’s my best friend,” “I’m married to my best friend,” “I get to raise a family with my best friend.”
Let’s dive a little deeper into that idea, just for fun. Here’s a checklist of what I do regularly with my best girlfriend:
– I smile every time I greet her
– I compliment her
– I offer to get her something (a drink, snack, etc)
– I ask her questions (“How are you?” or “How was your day?”) with genuine interest
– We make future plans together
There was a night not long ago in my household when my husband walked into nothing short of a war zone. We were in the middle of potty training (cue, toddler sitting on the potty), I was breastfeeding (literally, at that exact moment), and the oven timer went off. I was so frazzled that as soon as he walked in the door, I yelled into the kitchen, “Hey babe?! Come in here! He’s pooping! Dinner’s about to burn! Hold the baby!” …sound familiar?
We eventually ate and got the kids off to bed, much later in the evening. My husband was still in his shirt and tie. It dawned on me then that I never once said, “Hey, babe. How are you? How was your day?” Though it’s not the norm in our house, we’ve had plenty of days like that – where 5 o’clock hits and things start to go south.
Now imagine if your best friend walked into your house and you yelled something like, “Hey, Beth! Grab a towel from the pantry for me, would you? Hold the baby for a sec. Actually, can you go feed the dog for me real quick?!” She would probably slowly back out of the room, thinking, “I’ll come back later, when she’s not so…crazy.” Thank goodness our husbands don’t do that!
I’m giving myself a challenge -not only this Fathers Day, but every day after- that I will treat my husband like a true best friend. I hope you’ll join me.
Let’s try not only to smile, but to beam when he walks through the door. Let’s ask him questions about his interests. Let’s make plans with him. Let’s show him romantic attention – even flirt with him again. I bet you he’ll notice. And soon enough, he’ll offer to help out more, he’ll listen more intently, and he’ll show you the affection you need as a woman.
Sometimes being a Mommy feels like we’re giving 100% of ourselves to our kids. It’s easy to do (kids are loud), but if 100% goes to them, what is left for you and your spouse? Don’t forget that your most important relationship on this earth is the one with your partner. You are modeling for your children. The happier you are as a team, the happier you are as parents, and the happier your kids will be now and in the future.
Happy Fathers Day, Dads! We love and honor you, our best friends and partners in life.
*Photo compliments of Andreea B. Ballen Photography: NY area child and couple creative lifestyle & portrait photographer*